Thursday, February 3, 2011

Day 90

Kelsey went home to Jesus today at 5:17pm. We spent most of the day hovering over her bed, rubbing her head, her feet, her arms, and holding her hand. We just wanted her to feel our presence. We sang songs around her bed; we played her Ipod. We talked about things she liked, music she would be dancing to, told her we loved her over and over again. We also told her it was okay to go be with Jesus. She may have continued this fight longer than she wanted for us, but she fought hard. She suffered so much. She still had the most pleasant way to greet her doctors and still had the sweetest smile. God had a plan. We believed to the end that she would get a miracle, yet we also saw her going away. It was peaceful to the end. She was peaceful to the end. We were surrounded by our family. Kelly, Angie, and Karly were with Tracy and me. Tyler, Trent, Konner, and Kassidy were on phones singing with us. We were able to skype, and they all were able to see her and us. So many staff came by to hug on us. My sis Debbie with Deana and Hannah came to the hospital to just have closer. They are spending the night, and we were able to share thoughts, pray, and cry. We have a hole. No denying that. I am happy the suffering for her and our family is over, but so sad for our hole. Kelsey's personality was big...her faith, her laugh, her smile, her dancing. She certainly did things big. She left this world big also. By that I mean she touched more lives than I know. She stayed a medical mystery to the end. She has paved a way for other Dock 8 patients, including her sister. She was an incredible young woman. I feel so proud to be her mother. I am ready to come home, but this is not how I pictured it. I really thought I would be bringing her home. We have details to finish up here. We should be home this weekend sometime. We will have a memorial service for her in Muncie and probably here at NIH also. I haven't slept for 2 nights so I am heading off now to do this, but I wanted you all to know that we are not mad, angry, or otherwise. We have a void that cannot be filled for now. We are anxious to hear about how you knew Kelsey or how she has touched you or how her story has changed your life or how you have drawn nearer to Jesus. These are the things that will help fill the void. We want to fill the void with this good news.
Love,
Mom

9 comments:

  1. Im praying for you and your family! Losing a child hurts like nothing else ever will but knowing that they are in the arms of Jesus is the greatest comfort there could ever be. May the Lord grant all of you his peace that passeth all understanding! Alison Ringlespaugh

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  2. I never got to meet Kelsey but what a wonderful Christian example she has been. I work at Wabash and have followed your blog since the beginning. Kelsey has touched lives here that you will never know. We frequently talked in the office about the fight she had, the strength and faith. Thank you for sharing your daughter and the struggle she and your family went through. Our prayers are with you and your family.

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  3. I remember the night I baby sat for your girls. I remember the impact you both have had on my life and now following Kelsey's journey through this life. I have two kids with a genetic disorder and often times, I look at the hope your family has carried and it reminds me that I too have hope. I have stood in awe of your love for God and through all the challenges how all of you, including Kelsey held onto his power! I am praying for you as I can only imagine the void you face. Love you guys very much!

    ~mindy

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  4. I am so sorry for your loss and so impressed by your faith. I worked with Kelsey at the YOC. She was always such a joy to be around, and she worked so well with the kids. She did an amazing job of putting everything in perspective for both the staff and the residents that she worked with. Kelsey will definitely be missed.

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  5. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus . . . fill the void with your Holy Spirit.

    I have never met any of you. I don't know anyone you know. My oldest daughter came across your blog from someone else's blog months ago. Her name is Taylor and she and I have been fervently praying for Kelsey and Karly and your whole family ever since. We wake in the night and pray and we pray throughout the day. We will not stop now. Kelsey's faith, all of your faith, has been inspiring and has kept us at the feet of our Lord and Savior on your behalf, so we thank you for sharing this journey with us so that we may continue to lift you all up to the Father.

    Jesus, Jesus, Jesus . . . fill the void with yourself.

    With love in Christ,

    Denise R. from Texas

    “Holy, holy, holy

    is the Lord God Almighty,

    who was, and is, and is to come.”

    Revelation 4:8b

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  6. Our prayers are with you all! You are an amazing woman with an amazing family. It is no wonder those girls of yours are the way they are....Kelsey must be running the streets of gold singing and dancing as well. Our prayers are there....there are thousands of prayers going up for you now...sleep well. We are all here.

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  7. One of the memories that frequently comes to mind when I think of Kelsey is a solo dance that she did at church a number of years ago. I remember feeling so blessed as I watched her proudly worship her Savior and I also remember praying that our girls would have that same love and passion for Him.

    We are grieving with you this morning but also smiling through our tears because we know that Kelsey is now in the incomparable embrace of Jesus Christ (2 Cor. 5:8). And we also know that MANY will come to know Him through the testimony of her precious life (Gen. 50:20).

    Our God is "the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles." (2 Cor. 1:3-4) We are praying that His compassion and comfort will surround you...that you will sense Him drawing you near, under the shelter of His mighty wings. (Psalm 17:8, 36:7)

    In Him,

    Paul, Susan & girls

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  8. I am so sorry for your loss. Kelsey couldn't sleep because she said "the enemy was near." I prayed for her to have peaceful dreams. I prayed for her pain to abate. And I prayed for her family to be all right when the time was chosen for her.

    Put all those memories of her being in pain aside, and surround yourselves with memories of love and laughter. She will live on forever in your hearts.

    When these cold winds no longer blow, the snow is just another season behind us, and the crocuses, daffodils and tulips are taking a look around, look outside your window for the white dove. Feel the love for her all over again for she is with you.

    Whenever you think of her, she is with you. As time goes by, and the days get easier, when you come across one of your favorite pictures of Kelsey, press your lips to her cheeks and feel the love for her come to the surface. If you are spiritually alive, you will feel her love in return. Stay strong. My blessings to you all!

    Laura Banks

    (I know of your daughter because my daughter Jessica rooms with Tiana Hoffer at Purdue University. I am an insulin-dependent diabetic and would not have been able to donate.)

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  9. I didn't ever get to meet Karly, but I have followed your journey since I first became aware of it (Be The Match). Your whole family is a testimony to Christ and of the strength and peace He gives. Praying for you all at this unimaginably difficult time. God bless you. Claudia

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